March 17, 2004
Okay, so we’ve been in Iraq for a little over two weeks now and have performed a lot of different missions. Here are a few photos from a few fairly typical days:
On one of our first days, we did a little FOB (forward operating base) guarding. This is the view from a front gate guard post, protecting incoming convoys like this one.
During a patrol down a rural road, Matt says, “You’ve got to be fucking kidding me. Oh my god, you aren’t kidding me.” Yes, we drove through a flock of sheep, but that’s okay because from our dashboard, plastic Jesus watches over his flock. Which brings to mind a song.
Feel free to sing along:
Oh, I don’t care if it rains and freezes,
long as I got my plastic Jesus,
ridin’ on the dashboard of my car.I can go ninety-five miles per hour,
long as I got almighty power,
ridin’ on the dashboard of my car.Hit a car, hit a truck,
plastic Jesus don’t give a fuck,
ridin’ on the dashboard of my car…
For a few days we had to guard a bridge. We got swamped with kids wanting food. “Mister! Mister! Gimme food!” It helped pass the time, playing with the kids. Once we finally gave them MREs, all they’d do was ratfuck the candy out of them and dump the rest. (Santo with Wazina in the background)
One of the kids had a can of dip. Sean showed him how to pack it. Remember, education is the key.
While exploring the area around the bridge, we came across this mystery thing, across a canal and behind a locked fence. Some kids were pointing at it. I seriously don’t know what this is but am curious. Any ideas?
While guarding the bridge, we would stay at a nearby FOB that now is home to all the dead Iraqi tanks.
Our beautiful accommodations at the visited FOB. I slept on the concrete floor the first night, later upgrading to an inflatable sleeping mat with a slow leak.
Does this photo really need a caption? Shitters set up next to a missile. Photo by Matt.
The field showers were actually really awesome. They had hot water and good water pressure. They were run by an unattractive overweight female specialist that many guys concluded they would have sex with if given the chance. You’ve heard of “beer goggles”, well this phenomenon is known as “field goggles” and is even more severe.
October 21st, 2005 at 3:51 pm
Strangely enough, I appreciate your honesty about the “field goggle” type situations that come up. It is part of what makes you an extremely good story teller. But… I must admit that if I could be granted one wish to change something in the world, it would be to make males (infantry and geek all)less insulting and gross about sex.
It is some kind of evolutionary male-bonding thing, but why?
November 8th, 2005 at 12:04 am
Actually, it is an evolutionary bonding thing.
As Dane Cook says “the only thing a guy wants more than sex is to be part of a heist”
November 8th, 2005 at 5:33 pm
Debbi and all who read this – It’s just boys being boys, and lets face it most women stuck in similar situations would probably react the same way with the opposite sex. No offense taken here.
January 1st, 2009 at 12:29 pm
That thing in the picture you could not identify looks to have something to do with the large tower in the background, probably a generator or something.
I heard about your blog on listener supported WBAI.
November 30th, 2009 at 1:25 pm
Jason’s Black Shirt.
As many of you know I am Jason Hartley’s Stalker. My obsession with Jason began when I saw his photo for “Just Another Soldier.”
Jason wore a black t-shirt in that photo. It was cool for 2006. He looked like a WASPY Greenwich Village beat poet.
Well it is 2009 almost 2010 and Jason still rocks the black T-shirt. Even Zack Ephron changed his haircut. I think it is time for the black T-Shirt to go. It’s embarassing to stalk someone with worn out fashion. If Jason were a Seattle Grunge Rocker from 1991 I wouldn’t mind. But he is an author, a play writer and part time celebrity spokesman.
I think Jason should start looking into retro 1970’s baseball T-Shirts. Old School brown and Yellow Sand Diego Padres would be great. For you Homos he could sport the 1970s Houston Astros Gay Pride Rainbow Ts.
The other night i was looking into his apartment with a high powered scope… I mean binos and I saw him wearing a 1994 Woodstock Peace Patrol T-shirt. (Yes that’s right Jason was a Security Guard for the 25th Anniversery of Woodstock)
Jason went on a date with a girl to Momo Fuku on East 11th street and he was wearing his Black T-Shirt. He even posed for her like his book jacket! She was hot – not hot enough for Jason – but she was acceptable. Anyway, she left him without giving up any squirley-O! I think the T-Shirt turned her off – at least thats what I read in her gmail account I hacked… I mean ran across.
Jason should shop at Fred Spiegels in LA. Thats my opinion an das his official stalker it would help me out if you guys would get him started on an acceptable level of fashion.
Well I am off – Jason is heading out to Washington State and I have to be there to spy on him at the airport.
August 15th, 2010 at 12:53 pm
The tank grave yard and your humble sleeping arrangements look like the are at Camp Taji. The building looks like the ones my motor pool was in. And the Tank grave yard ran next to a road that ran by our brigade area. I was there in 07-08 with 4th brigade 2nd infantry Stryker brigade combat team